Race Recap: State #13: Tennessee

Race: St. Jude Nashville Rock 'n' Roll Marathon
Official Result: DN effing F

Charity: St. Jude
Amount Raised: $500

Pardon me while I turn this into a confessional.   Bless me reader, for I have sinned, it has been 13 months since I finished my last marathon and these are my sins.

1) I sprained by ankle in September during the night run in Ragnar Michigan and after three months of not running on it at the end of 2017, didn't bother to rehab it properly with strength exercises.
2) I got shingles in February (shingles!  who gets shingles at my age??) and used it as an excuse to not run even though I was feeling well enough to later in the month.
3) Even though it snowed in mid-April, I blamed the weather for every weekend I didn't run in March and April to at least build up a modicum of endurance leading up to the race.  My longest run this year was 8 miles on a treadmill.  No hill workouts.  No HIIT.

your name here?

I firmly resolve with the help of thy grace, to sin no more and to prepare myself before even thinking about registering for the next occasion of a marathon, amen.

Okay, now that that's out of the way, let me get to the recap.

I booked this race back in December with the fullest intent of being back in shape and ready to conquer Tennessee, and for what I feel is one of the best causes out there, for St. Jude.  My fundraising requirement was $500, and I made it to the day before the race with $400 raised, so I was worried I wasn't going to reach my goal.  This was going to be a quick weekend trip with the family but it turned out Children's Day at my kids' school, which is run by Mae, was the Friday before.  That would have been fine if the race was Sunday, but I screwed up the dates and found out just weeks before that the race was on Saturday, so I had to go down there on my own.

The 500 mile drive down felt relatively easy and uneventful while listening to Marc Maron's WTF podcast episode with Jason Alexander and a few of the latest episodes of Handsome Rambler and High Society.

Pre-race carboload

I arrived at Music City Hall in pretty good time to get my packet but there were signs that this was going to not go well - There was a shirt at the expo that had all the names of the runners registered for the full, and looked like a souvenir I was going to buy, but my name was nowhere to be found after scanning the lines of names several times.  I laughed and thought to myself, guess they only included the runners. Another sign was when I made it to the hotel in Mt. Juliet, a 'burb about 15 miles east of the city proper, I discovered that I forgot to pack my charger for my Garmin Forerunner 230 which was just over 60% battery. I thought maybe if I finish in under 4 hours I'll be ok, hahaha. I downloaded a Run Tracker app from Fitness22 as a backup, and it turned out to be more accurate than I thought it would be.

The Hampton Inn had an Olive Garden nearby so I put in a To Go order for some alfredo pasta for pickup at 6pm.  Heading back to the hotel though after picking up my dinner I saw there was a Martin's BBQ a stone's throw from the hotel.  Damn it! I wished I saw it pulling into the hotel, and would have gladly sacrificed the carbs for a delicious delicious BBQ dinner.

I brought my ankle stabilizer with me but since I hadn't trained with it since January I didn't feel comfortable running in it. After a test walk around the hotel I decided to go without it. I also didn't feel comfortable running in my St. Jude singlet as it showed off my sad amorphous dad body and accompanying belly I had nurtured into a magnificent embarrasment. I spent the night watching the Sox game on my phone and the draft and NBA playoffs on TV before passing out some time before midnight.

Since the $20.00 reserved parking was sold out there was a blurb on the website saying to arrive early for free parking at Nissan Stadium because of limited spaces.  With the parking lot opening at 4am I thought it would be safe if I got there at 4:30 and slept in the car for an hour.  So I set an alarm at my phone at 3:45pm (because I suck at life) and a safety net wake-up call for 4am (thankfully).

I set my parking app to mark where my car was when I arrived, but since I was parked in the third row closest to Nissan stadium I wasn't sure this was necessary. I did arrive at 4:30 which turned out to be extreme overkill but managed to sleep an extra hour in the car.

VIP Loungin'

While walking over to the start line a little after 6 I started chatting with a Nashville native who was nervous about his half.  We talked running for a bit since it was a mile to get from the parking lot to the start line. I joked that we should get credit for this distance and deduct it from our race.

St. Jude had a Heroes pre-race area and I flashed my wristband and was granted access to Bridgestone Arena, a VIP place to keep warm and grab some water and bagels while awkwardly sitting around with people I didn't know. There was a call to take a picture at the start line at 7am, and as people began to file out I found my way to my coral. I secretly didn't want to be in the picture being in the shape I was in.

Good morning, Tennessee!

I was assigned coral 24 out of 25, and was already worried about not finishing within the allotted time before the race even started, so I slipped into coral 10 with people much fitter than me.  I figured that would buy me an extra 15 minutes before getting swept up by the sag wagon.  I tried posting my good morning picture on Facebook but couldn't get a signal between the buildings downtown so it kept retrying and failing. Another sign of things to come.

As coral 10 got underway at around 7:25am I felt optimistic and filled with adrenaline but it became obvious I wasn't going to keep pace with this group.  The initial quarter mile was a nice downhill jaunt down Broadway but as I settled in after a mile I felt wave after wave of runners (and what looked like 80% of them running the half) just flying by me and my 11:30 pace. I opened up Facebook to see if my post went through, and it did, and as my phone picked up reception again my watch vibrated to let me know I got a notification email from St. Jude with a donation. Jeanine, a classmate from grade school who had just recently crushed a half marathon, put me over the top for my fundraising and I was overjoyed to have met my goal and put an extra spring in my step. At the same time, I thought uh oh. I better finish this race now...

The good feeling carried me for a few miles but the reality began to kick in. So this is what it feels like to try to run a marathon as a total non-runner. I knew going in it would be hilly, and to be honest it really wasn't too bad; I'd compare the elevation a lot like the Hogeye Marathon in Fayetteville, AK. I just kind of power walked up the hills and ran down them to navigate my way through.  One of the other runners tapped me on the shoulder and said, "I've figured you out... walking up the hills and running down!" "Uh, you've got me!" was all I could think of to respond with.

I tried a new product on the course, made by Science in Sport. Go Isotonic gels were being handed out and they were so good! I slurped down a lemon lime packet and it was like a more watery version of a Gu Gel. I thought about chasing one down with a beer shots that were being handed out a little further down the way but thought better of it.

It was around here where I saw the best sign nailed to a telephone pole: "Admit it, you're doing this for the facebook picture."  Guilty! I thought to myself. A close second was, "You think you're tired? Try holding this sign all day!"

One of the many bands on the course

I felt something pop in my left ankle as I was turning a corner just after the mile 8 marker, like a knuckle being cracked, but since there wasn't any acute pain I shrugged it off and kept going. But each subsequent mile got slower and slower, and my ankle just began throbbing, which made me change my gait and threw everything out of balance. Not long after my right knee started to hurt, followed by my right hip. I started walking more and running less, even though the course let up a bit with all the hills. I'm sure if I trained more I would have built up more strength in my ankle and I would have been ok.

Decisions, decisions

Right before the course split between the full and half-ers was a sight no one ever wants to see, a downed runner. Lying on her back along the sidewalk with her long pale legs straight out beyond the curb and into the road and ominously still like a mannequin's was an older woman in her 60's pressing a small white bandage to her head. The look in her eyes said it all, a look of shock. Next to her feet was a bright pool of blood where she must have eaten the pavement. My initial reaction was to stop and help but she was already accompanied by a couple officers, so I kept going. My heart goes out to her, and I pray she recovers quickly.

My thoughts of her made me not really want to run anymore and as I hit the split at around mile 11 I was running in the half marathon lane. I texted Mae to tell her I was just going to run the half and she texted me back with an "ok" but at the very last moment I stopped and pulled off to the side for a minute to really think about my options. I had to try, and decided to keep going down the full path. Note: if you're registered on race day to run the full, and switch to and complete the half course, do not take a finisher medal.  You could be taking a medal from someone who is rightfully registered to receive one.

It wasn't long before I began regretting my decision. Most races where there is a full and half option run at the same time save the best parts of the course for the half, and this course was no exception. The next few miles was just a long boring trudge through corporate parkway drives with not much to look at which is soul crushing. I was not running much anymore and just wanted to get to the 13.1 check point at around the 3 hour mark.

I started doing the math at mile 14.  With 12 miles to go it would take me at least four more hours to get it done.  It would take me over 7 hours to cross the finish line, and with a 6 hour time limit I wouldn't have finished on time.  I pulled up the car locator app on my phone and saw I was over 3 miles away from my car.  If I continued on it would take me even further away from my car and it was at that point I made the decision to pull myself off course. The thought that I had to drive myself home also weighed heavily on my mind. There was a Gatorade station and as I grabbed my last drink I unpinned my bib as a form of surrender. I set a path to get to my car in google maps and began trudging through sidewalk-less streets, dodging cars and climbing bridges over highways. I sat down a few times and each time I got up got more and more difficult. I had an old pack of Clif Bloks from god knows when and discovered these things definitely have a shelf life to them; it was like biting into what I can imagine the texture and consistency an umbilical cord would have.

Course map

Walk of shame. Bleh.

I bypassed the finish line festivities as I finally approached the stadium and made it back to my car after being an hour off course. I sat in my car and felt both relieved and incredibly disappointed.  The air conditioner on full blast, a sense of dread came over as I realized I had to now go back and drive 7+ hours back home with nothing to show for it. Since it was only noon, I couldn't check into a hotel and clean up anyway so I just hopped on I-24 and started driving home. Deep down, I felt like staying an extra night was a luxury and I didn't deserve to indulge. I was salty. I mean, literally.  Salt from my sweat had dried along my forehead and neck over the course of the morning. I stopped at an Arby's drive-thru to get my protein and of course went with the half pound roast beef. I changed out of my compression socks and Hoka Cliftons in the parking lot while inhaling my lunch like the feral kid from Mad Max.

I stopped at a rest area in Kentucky to post my defeat on Facebook and how my day went. It really sucked to do that, but the comments of support picked my spirit up and the idea that I would make it back home to my family earlier than expected really helped. I didn't physically start to feel better until I downed a Monster from one of the vending machines, the first caffeine I had for the day. I was surprised how focused I was able to remain since my life depended on it for the whole drive back. Maybe I invented a new sport, auto racing/running.

This is my first DNF since Wisconsin, when I tried running with norovirus back in 2013. There were no excuses for failing this time.  Seems like every time I write one of these I claim to have hit my fitness bottom, but now this is really it. In the end though I did learn two things. One, I can finish a half marathon no problem without training. Two, I can absolutely cannot finish a full marathon without training. And I don't ever want to go through that again.

Nissan Stadium on the left, car somewhere near there

Huge thank you to my running friends Jeanine, Blaine, Theresa, and my co-workers Catharine, Sheryll, Michelle, Graham and Katie and also to my mom and to my poker buddies who also chipped in over the course of a few poker nights. Thanks to you St. Jude families never have to worry about hospital bills and can focus on their children getting better.

Registration: $0.00
Gas: ~$90
Hotel: Hampton Inn Mt. Juliet $167.38